thewordofweb: (fuck you too: by ?)
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By the time Joe is out like a light, I've got a mild window of opportunity to go before he wakes up and I want to be there at his side. I'm hoofing it like it's Currahee all over, but it's as important as then to me. By the time I reach the Officer's Club, my fist is pounding on the door with urgency and I won't stop until I get a result.

"Major Winters!" I call out, anxious and firm at once. "Major Winters, I need to talk to you! Now!"

Date: 2009-04-22 10:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] not-a-quaker.livejournal.com
I'm still shaken from the events earlier in the day, my encounter with Joe and seeing that Landsberg uniform. God, the smell of it, it's still lingering so fresh in my mind it's almost as if it's followed me back home, taken up residence in my head along with the sharp image of those men, little more than death walking.

At the pounding on the door I look up sharply from where I'm sitting, elbows on the table with my hands clenched together in front of my mouth. I recognize Web's voice immediately and jump up to answer the door, wondering if something else has happened with Joe or if he's coming to talk about the very thing I've been thinking about since I left the Homestead. "Web. What is it?"

Date: 2009-04-22 11:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewordofweb.livejournal.com
I take entrance to the room immediately without permission, knowing that I don't have much time to make my argument. "I need to get back to him as soon as I can," I say, breathless from the run over. "He's not sleeping too deeply. Remember that talk we had?" I remind him, voice somewhat weak. "I need you to help him, now."

Date: 2009-04-22 11:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] not-a-quaker.livejournal.com
I frown slightly as I shut the door behind Web. I wasn't sure, though I'd suspected, and now it seems I'm right. "I've talked to him, Web," I say calmly, even though beneath the surface I'm worried as hell. "Are you saying he hasn't been to see anyone yet?"

Date: 2009-04-22 11:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewordofweb.livejournal.com
I just stare at Major Winters, fraught with distress and I can't even believe that I'm showing him this much of myself considering how little I know the man. "Joe Liebgott actively seeking out help? I've begged him before to go see someone with me, about me, and he won't even do that," I remind him. "He's not well and I love him," I nearly spit both those facts out. "And I need him to get better," I add, quieter than the last shout.

Date: 2009-04-22 11:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] not-a-quaker.livejournal.com
"I know," I reply, to all of it, I suppose. It occurs to me that I know because I understand how he feels, and I'm not sure what that means but I don't have time to examine it right now. Right now I need to do what I can to fix this. "He will get better, but he had a hell of a shock today. Give it a little time, let him get some rest if he can, and I'll come by tomorrow and talk to him again. And this time I'll make it an order."

Date: 2009-04-22 11:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewordofweb.livejournal.com
I stare at him for a long moment, wondering if it's as easy a fix as that. More than that, I almost hate that I'm so helpless in the face of this. "I know perfectly well how bad today was, sir," I say, voice clipped. "I was there and I'll be there going forward. It's more than just ordering him. Since I can't do it, you need to make sure he gets better."

Date: 2009-04-23 11:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] not-a-quaker.livejournal.com
I know that Webster is worried for Joe, that he wants him to heal, but rushing isn't going to fix anything. If I had some way to instantly fix things, for any of my men, I would do it in a heartbeat, but I don't. "I will do everything I possibly can, but it's one step at a time. Let me give him the order first, and we'll go from there. And I promise, I won't give up."

Date: 2009-04-24 01:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewordofweb.livejournal.com
I nod, almost lost and distant. I can't fix this. That had been startingly clear the moment I had walked into the horror scene. I tense my jaw, swallow a lump in my throat and look at Major Winters, feeling lost. "I can't help with this and it kills me. Because I just want to scream and he needs better. And Landsberg is never going away, I just...I wish I could do more."

Date: 2009-04-24 09:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] not-a-quaker.livejournal.com
"You're not the only one that wishes that," I say, putting a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "Just hang tough, Webster. Things will get better."

Date: 2009-04-25 03:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewordofweb.livejournal.com
I don't know if that's true and a part of me sincerely doubts it is, but I manage a terse smile and give a nod. "Thank you, for taking an involvement," I get out, though it's difficult for me.

Date: 2009-04-28 03:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] not-a-quaker.livejournal.com
I nod, once. "Of course." I can't imagine not getting involved, not when it's one of my men, and even though we're far from the battlefield, and maybe they don't need me as much any more, I still feel a responsibility for each of them.

Date: 2009-04-28 06:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewordofweb.livejournal.com
I clear my throat, now feeling slightly ashamed for being so very much on the offensive. I offer Major Winters a graceful nod. "I should be getting back to him," I admit, feeling very uncomfortable now in the presence of this place.

Date: 2009-04-29 04:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] not-a-quaker.livejournal.com
"That's probably a good idea," I say, moving to hold the door open for him. Back in the war, I wouldn't have tolerated the tone he'd taken, one that walked the line of insubordination, but here, I know he's just worried.

Date: 2009-04-29 12:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thewordofweb.livejournal.com
With one additional nod of my head, I'm off and escaping the Officer's Club, knowing that I shouldn't have lost my temper, but what's done is done.

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